Gargoyles are living stone ornaments that can be seen throughout the land of Albion in Fable II. They have small, light grey faces with sparkling eyes, and are renowned and reviled among the people of Albion for their habit of mocking and insulting any and all passersby, including the Hero of Bowerstone. Their unique, heavily-accented Scottish banter is a dead giveaway as to their presence.
The gargoyles will remain silent until the Hero learns the Aimed Ranged Attack. At this point, any gargoyles encountered will harass the Hero and can be shot with a ranged weapon. After shooting the first gargoyle, the Gargoyles quest is activated, and the Hero will receive the Gargoyle Map, which leads to the legendary Gargoyle's Trove beneath the bridge in Bowerstone Market. This lengthy quest involves destroying all fifty gargoyles in Albion, in exchange for periodic rewards (for every ten gargoyles destroyed), as well as a final reward, The Rammer, a legendary crossbow.
"Ach, I can smell your awful breath... all the way from here."
"I'd ask you to try and shoot me... but ya'd probably poke your eye out instead."
"I might be made of stone, but at least I ain't stone blind."
"Hey! You're that mighty adventurer, aren't you? Well, I've got a quest for you: KISS MY STONEY ARSE!"
"I bet your shooting's as bad as your body odour!"
"I heard there was a prophecy about you... yeah... something about THE WORST MARKSMAN OF ALL TIME! Yeah, that was it! Hahaha!"
"You must be the sorriest excuse of a Hero I ever saw, and I've seen plenty."
"Ye cannae hit me. Ye cannae hit me! Haha!"
"Hi, my name's Barn Door. Bet ye cannae hit meeee!"
"You look more like a crack-pot than a crack-shot!"
"Don't you try and ignore me, you pink-bellied numpty!"
"Is this what I've been sittin' here waiting for all these centuries? You?! Bah!"
"I can tell by yer glazed over eyes ye cannae shoot straight!"
"Hey! Hero! Do you have any health or potions? Hahaha, you ain't got no skill, that's as plain as day!"
"Ach, away with ye, ye scavenger dog-monkey."
"Hey! Look at me when I'm insulting ya! You walking sack of compost!"
"You think you're smart? I've seen more brains in a slop-bucket!"
"Lets see your aim... If ya got one!"
"You couldnae hit a castle wi'a ball of dung!"
"Ach, ya blunderin' goon, you couldnae hit me in a million years!"
"Tell me this, how does a rubbish shooter like you stay alive? You must be a right jammy bugger!"
"What are you gonna do, huh? Shoot me? Ooh, I'm shiverin', mummy, help!"
"Tell me this, is it true you don't know which way to hold a crossbow? Hahaha!"'
"Oh, look! My face is all exposed!"
"Which one ya cannae hit me with? Yer gun, or yer sneeze?"
"Hey, what you are doing with all those weapons? You might as well use a wee toy slingshot, ye big baby!"
Fable III Edit
Gargoyles make a couple of minor appearances in Fable III. In the quest Gnomes are Great!, Brian in Brightwall, who is an avid Gnome enthusiast, enlists the Hero of Brightwall's aid in tracking down a special birthday present he ordered for his favourite gnome, Jonathan, which was never delivered. The Hero travels to Mistpeak Valley and finds the waylaid coach, along with Jonathan's present...a gargoyle. Back in Brightwall, Brian uses the gargoyle to conduct a ritual that breathes life into all his gnomes, an "act that could not possibly have any negative consequences in the future."
The next time the Hero visits Brightwall, Brian has a new quest, Gnomes are Evil!. Brian's use of the gargoyle has transformed his once-amiable gnomes into vulgar, pint-sized abominations, and they have all escaped. He implores the Hero to track down all fifty of his beloved gnomes, now scattered across all of Albion and Aurora, while he attempts to find a way to reverse the gargoyle's effects. Like the gargoyles of Fable II, the gnomes will start lobbing insults whenever the Hero draws near, and must be dealt with by being shot with a firearm, which will magically transport them back to Brian's home in Brightwall. Once all fifty gnomes have been returned, Brian performs another ritual over them, exorcising the gargoyle's dark energies and leaving his gnomes inanimate (but still sentient) once again. The ritual culminates with the Hero destroying the gargoyle. If the Hero hesitates, the gargoyle will let fly with insults from Fable II.
During the quest The Pen is Mightier..., after finding ten books for Samuel at the Brightwall Academy, the Hero will be tasked with recovering an especially rare tome from the basement of a house in Bowerstone Old Quarter. Within this house is a collection of memorabilia from previous Fable games. One of the exhibits contains a gargoyle, with a note that reads, "One of the few survivors of the Great Talking Gargoyle Massacre. The trauma has struck him dumb." This refers to the Hero of Bowerstone's quest to destroy the gargoyles in Fable II.
Finally, in Bowerstone Market, beneath Bower Bridge on the river's bottom, lies a grate adorned with the image of a Gargoyle, marking the entrance to the now inaccessible Gargoyle's Trove from Fable II.