When close to a gnome, they will shout advice to you. This can range from helpful to downright insulting: (Note that they only give good advice at the end of Gnomes are Great! , afterwards, when they turn evil and scatter around the world of the Gnomes are Evil! quest, they'll only insult you in various way.)

Good Advice "Always look both ways before crossing a road." "You should never try to move an injured person." "Eat your vegetables." "Breakfast is the most important meal of the day."

nsults "You want to know what I like most about people? They die!" "That's a nice looking weapon. Compensating for something!?" "Here doggy doggy! Come over here and die..." "The ladies must really love you... You could share makeup!" (To male heroes) "Those are nice shoes. But aren't your Gran's feet cold without them?!" "I'd like to come to your house for tea. And then I'd have your mum!" "You look familiar. Oh yeah, like this girly that I used to SHAG!" "Your mother!" "Winter's my favourite season. Cause everybody dies!" "Are you lost milady? I can direct you to the nearest kitchen?" (To female heroes) "Why don't you come over here and SHOW ME THE GOODS!!" (To female heroes) "I feel like celebrating today, because today's the day ya die!" "It's a nice day apart from where you're standing" "If it were up to me nobody would get sick. They'd just die! Starting with you!" "Dogs are loyal and noble. And right tasty too!" "We could be best friends, if I liked people with an arse for a face!" "There's our noble hero. A big fat stupid ugly noble hero." "Oh I didn't notice you there. How d'ya like being so insignificant?" "Excuse me have you got the time? To get stuffed?!" "If I had a friend like you, I'd tell them secrets. Like I'm gonna set you on fire!" "I can help you find what you're looking for. Step 1: Pull your head out your arse!" "I've said it before and I'll say it again. I hate you!" "I like to think about puppies. About slowly, slowly crushing them." "Oh you are so sweet. Like a bloody great TART!" "I can't decide if I like your looks or your personality better; it's like comparing mud to sewage!" "I sensed your presence before you even arrived. What did you eat!?" "You should go somewhere nice and peaceful. Like a cemetery!" "Haha you're funny, but looks aren't everything!" "Look at you, strong arms, broad shoulders, a squared jaw. YOU ARE ONE WEIRD LOOKING LADY!" "Your weapon's bent. Oh wait, that's you!" "Sometimes I want someone to talk to. And sometimes I just want someone to kick in the crotch!" "You remind me of an old friend. He was a twit! Jyst like you!" "Must be nice, being able to lick your own privates. But doesn't that embarrass your dog?"